Tom reviews some stuff about gay marriage
There's a storm a-brewin' apparently! A gay storm with faggot rainbows and queer lightning bolts and sodomy! Sodomy means "butt sex", by the way.
That's fuckin gay.
See, I don't understand why the gays want to get gay married. I mean, if gay people get married than straight people will have to... ummm... take... gay vaccines?
This is how gay marriage hurts children.
I'm not sure what to write about gay marriage, but I feel like I should.
I think I should dissect the arguments of the people who oppose gay marriage, but I can't really figure out what it is.
I really want to put this here... Stephen Colbert called gay marriage "Arma-gay-don".
Wow! Perez Hilton doesn't look like shit for once!
Now, I've never been the biggest fan of Perez. Honestly, I don't know what the big deal is about him (other than the fact that he's doing what I'm doing in a different and much more successful way). Buuuut, Dennis Prager is an idiot. I mean, the eharmony case? Really? Hmmm... after watching this clip I went to eharmony.com and tried, as a man, to look for a man. It made sure I wasn't looking for straight guys. Prager, being the fucking idiot that he is, seemed to imply that I'd get 10,000 accidental straight guys if I was a man looking for a man. As if computers couldn't understand "if then" statements (FYI: they can).
I'll put this analogy out there to explain to all the Dennis Pragers of the world can understand. Eharmony is a building.
Eharmony is a really fucking cool building!
When you walk to the receptionist, let's call the receptionist "Taylor". A good unisex name so I don't offend anyone or look like I'm trying to be too progressive.
Taylor!
Taylor asks you if you'd like to meet people of the same sex or opposite sex.
It's a tough question, I know.
Then, in this building, there are little things called "rooms" where each group intermingles. There is a room for the homosexuals and a room for the heterosexuals so that those straight, burly, right-wing men won't get icky man-juice on them because every pussy lovin', 23-inch bicep havin', lumberjackin' motherfuckin', manly man knows that queers don't take "Sorry, I'm straight" for an entirely reasonable answer. And every God fearin', red state livin' in, faggot stompin', forest burnin', torture lovin', bald eagle stuffer out there knows that the gay is highly contagious. More contagious than the common cold if cookies were dipped in the virus and passed out to fat first graders. Your body gets tricked, just like the fat children, and all of a sudden, one day you wake up 30 years later diabetic with one foot!!! That's how gay works.
Just like stage one gay
Full blown gay.
All of that was tangential. I'm just going to cave and Google some arguments against gay marriage and pick them apart with little pictures and stupid captions. K?
...in part two, I mean.
See, I don't understand why the gays want to get gay married. I mean, if gay people get married than straight people will have to... ummm... take... gay vaccines?
I'm not sure what to write about gay marriage, but I feel like I should.
I think I should dissect the arguments of the people who oppose gay marriage, but I can't really figure out what it is.
I really want to put this here... Stephen Colbert called gay marriage "Arma-gay-don".
Wow! Perez Hilton doesn't look like shit for once!
Now, I've never been the biggest fan of Perez. Honestly, I don't know what the big deal is about him (other than the fact that he's doing what I'm doing in a different and much more successful way). Buuuut, Dennis Prager is an idiot. I mean, the eharmony case? Really? Hmmm... after watching this clip I went to eharmony.com and tried, as a man, to look for a man. It made sure I wasn't looking for straight guys. Prager, being the fucking idiot that he is, seemed to imply that I'd get 10,000 accidental straight guys if I was a man looking for a man. As if computers couldn't understand "if then" statements (FYI: they can).
I'll put this analogy out there to explain to all the Dennis Pragers of the world can understand. Eharmony is a building.
Eharmony is a really fucking cool building!
When you walk to the receptionist, let's call the receptionist "Taylor". A good unisex name so I don't offend anyone or look like I'm trying to be too progressive.
Taylor!
Taylor asks you if you'd like to meet people of the same sex or opposite sex.
It's a tough question, I know.
Then, in this building, there are little things called "rooms" where each group intermingles. There is a room for the homosexuals and a room for the heterosexuals so that those straight, burly, right-wing men won't get icky man-juice on them because every pussy lovin', 23-inch bicep havin', lumberjackin' motherfuckin', manly man knows that queers don't take "Sorry, I'm straight" for an entirely reasonable answer. And every God fearin', red state livin' in, faggot stompin', forest burnin', torture lovin', bald eagle stuffer out there knows that the gay is highly contagious. More contagious than the common cold if cookies were dipped in the virus and passed out to fat first graders. Your body gets tricked, just like the fat children, and all of a sudden, one day you wake up 30 years later diabetic with one foot!!! That's how gay works.
Just like stage one gay
Full blown gay.
All of that was tangential. I'm just going to cave and Google some arguments against gay marriage and pick them apart with little pictures and stupid captions. K?
...in part two, I mean.
Labels: America, culture, gay, homosexual, marriage, priorities, same sex, society
posted by I Am Not Ghengis Kahn at
6:56 PM
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